Life Without My Computer

My computer broke and I am not happy about it! I love it. Love.

Aside from that, I am doing a lot of self-reflecting and realizing what a psycho I am. Or, I should say, how warped my mentality is. I am a crazy worker, like non-stop (and I don't think I even accomplish that much). I am here in Rwanda, stressed out and I cannot figure out why I allow things, like work, to get to me. It's truly amazing how worked up I can get. You'd think that I was responsible for everything and anything in the world. I must just have a major ego problem. Everyone around me is so capable but so very few actually take the initiative which is really frustrating. But, starting next week a couple more of the PLP guys will be back so they will help a ton. I just have to focus on r-e-l-a-x-i-n-g or at least managing my time better. There is enough work between W2R, AWF and the bball camp to stay busy for 24hrs a day and so far, I am letting it take over. I have actually made myself sick! I've got a headache, borderline swollen glands and no voice (but I have been told I talk too much so that could be the reason as well). It shows me that I have to prioritize. In my head, I think a hard worker is someone who is constantly working and usually stressed...I don't think that is the only way to be. I think I can still be a hard worker...in moderation (haha, story of my life, moderation and I are not friends). So, basically, Rwanda has been a mirror and I'm not loving what I see. Thankfully I know I'll never be prefect but I sure hope someday soon I will be relaxed. I'm learning so much here!! I'm so thankful.

For bball camp, I am a slacker and am behind on my newsletters but like I said earlier, I am working like crazy and there just aren't enough hours. So, it will get done and I'm sorry for the delay.

Basketball yesterday was the best one yet. The older boys have really started to step up. They were directing people to the right positions, being vocal, enthusiastic, and so helpful! We had a dance/rap session and played games. I am so proud of all of them. As for the younger ones, 4-9, it was not as positive of an experience. Yesterday it was a sob-fest. According to Rachel, they cried the entire time. We had a counselor working with us and she was saying one of the reasons they may have acted like that is because now they know they will get the attention. They are so used to being ignored or turned away that now that they know we are here and we care, they can let it out and cry. They know their crying will get them some loving so they do it. Knowing that breaks my heart that next week is the last week! We’ve just started our relationship. I can't believe it...

I miss you all and LOVE you.