Be grateful

I was going to start off by staying this will be a short one because I am tired but knowing me, it probably won't be so I'll just jump in...

Went to Nyamata today for the first day of a four day sociotherapy session for the victims and perpetrators of the genocide. The way the workshop is set up is on day one individuals discuss the history, what happened, why it happened, and give people the opportunity to express their personal loss of both tangible (people, houses, cows) and intangible (peace, love, faith in humanity, unity, etc). The following days are geared towards moving forward through forgiveness and reconciliation. The primary goal of the workshop is to start the healing process for these people. If they can not heal, they will never be capable of truly forgiving and without forgiveness, there is no reconciliation. Without reconciliation, Rwanda will continue to struggle as it has for the last 100 years. (As sick as this may sound, I was happy to hear that the tribes (Hutus, Tutsi, and Twa) were confrontational before the Belgium's or white folk got there. They made it worse, but it was not all peace and harmony before. One of the many things I like about the leader of our group is that he is very into ownership - he makes each person take accountability for their role in the genocide and leaves little room for blaming others).

Throughout the workshop, I learned a lot about African culture and the way that African families interact with each other. Apparently, most Africans do not express their emotions to each other, even their children. "I love you" is seldomly said and for the most part, due to numerous actions of the parents, many children grow up without a sense of value. As a result, the speaker quickly mentioned how getting over tangible loss was much simpler than the intangible. I was a bit dumbfounded because, although on some levels it does make sense, I find it very hard to believe it is that easy to get over the loss of a parent or sibling - mine at least are not that easy to replace. After only living here for 11 days, it is obvious that life is not valued has highly here as it is in the US but I was pretty taken back by how nonchalantly the loss of a family member was taken. That being said, it could also be because the workshop is geared towards Rwanda on a whole and Rwanda will not survive unless the people have a sense of love, peace and unity but still...

The whole tribes thing baffles me...ethnic ideology is the root of so much evil. If only people could just look at each other as human beings the world would be such a better place...such a simple concept but so impossible for most to understand. It all goes back to DO YOU... haha.

In addition to the workshop, I went to an orphanage for children with disabilities - rip my heart out much. It was wonderful to be there but really, really hard to leave. It's amazing how well you can communicate with people without using words. There were only a couple kids there because most went home for the holidays but I had one in my arms at all times and the other latched onto my leg. I believe both of the boys were around five and had pretty severe mental disabilities (beautiful smiles though). There was also a blind four year old, a three year old who had been found in the brush a week earlier (I have never seen a skinner child in my life) and a 15 year old who could not speak but was weaving away. I walked away from that experience very grateful for all the gifts I have in my life; having the basics is enough!

Overall it was an eventful and emotional day...off to Tanzania Thursday (I think, still have to check out safety stuff) I'll keep you posted.

I love, love, love you (said like Mr. Darcy from Pride and Prejudice (2005))

Peace.